First have a healthy, balanced dinner.
Then walk to the kitchen, pass a pizza pie your 17 year old with a metabolic rate of a cheetah ordered as a snack and keep walking.
Loop around, go back into the kitchen once he’s done and spy the box.
Because being wasteful is bad, decide to not throw out the leftover slice. But since you’re also literally trying to walk your ass off, only cut off a small piece. Go back to watching tv.
Loop around. And again.
And again.
Calories consumed in small pieces don’t count. It’s a law.
When finished delete your 17 year olds door dash account to show him who’s boss and project your anger and guilt.
Here’s the tale visually
Vol. 2 coming soon… how to eat a donut in 29 bites.
wifemothereventplanner 