Dark and Stormy

Question: What’s the only thing New Jersey is good for?

Answer: To see the New York City skyline!

…just kiddin’

not really.

NWK to SSO to LAX to NWK

I’m home.  I know I’m home because I’ve already made breakfast, yelled at someone and forgotten to water my orchid.  Back to normal.  I always feel like my kids grew while I was away.  They seem taller, wiser, more unshowered than usual.

Here’s some non sequitur pictures from the trip.  If I wasn’t so sleep deprived I’d write individual posts about them and delight you with witty commentary but I’m too tired.

We had a quick lunch before the event yesterday, the waiter asked us if we’d like to share some hummus.  We said yes – you should always say yes to hummus.   Here’s what he brought us….

There’s also a pile of warm pita bread that wouldn’t fit in the photo.  Are you thinking I live the life of Riley when I’m traveling?  Trust me, not true.  I didn’t take pictures of the sad Subway sandwich I had for breakfast that morning at the airport.

The hotel (sanctuary, resort, hideaway, heaven are better words to describe this place) where the event was held was covered with beautiful gardens. Look at these flowers!!

And here’s one last picture – mini pork dumplings from the reception.  So pretty and so porky (I’m told).

Are you all wondering what I’m talking about? Me too. Sorry. Tomorrow’s post will make sense.  Maybe.

The good, the bad, and the opposite of ugly

First the good. San Francisco, how I love you. Your weather, your laid back attitude, and your ridiculously nice people make me wanna pack up my tribe and move West.

Adios for now. By the way, you are much prettier than this airplane shot.

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The ugly. Me….bringing up the rear on the flight

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But look what was waiting for me when I got to L.A. …even if it is for just a few hours.

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Views from a hotel room

I made it to San Francisco – part one of the California trek is underway. We have an event tonight and then it’s an early flight to L.A. on Thursday – then another event that night – followed by a redeye that gets me home by Friday morning!

With all the delays I didn’t check into the hotel last night until 11:30pm PST. But because I like to keep on EST when traveling… I was wide awake by 3:15am PST (my usual). I ordered some breakfast to kill time. Here’s how the room service convo went:

Me: hi there – can I order some room service please?

Dude: Ofcourse, unfortunately we are only serving from the late night menu I’m afraid – the dinner service is over.

Me: no problem at all, because I’d like breakfast! Coffee and rye toast.

Dude: (……long pause…..)oh yes, not a problem.

Bless his heart and mine.

Anyway- in the tradition of things I won’t be able to enjoy while I’m here see picture below…

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California Dreamin’

One of the best parts about being an event planner is the travel. One of the worst parts is also the travel.

Can you tell my flight, the one I left my family behind for, the one that WAS going to get me to the hotel in time for a civilized dinner, the one that I had been upgraded for, that one – is delayed. 2 hours. No reason givin. Just ’cause.

What’s a gal to do….

I know! Crappy food and booze should solve all my problems.

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That’s an organically red chip. Really.

I’d like to thank the Academy….

This is so nice.  This is so sweet.  So unexpected.  I’ve been nominated for the Beautiful Blogger award (in blog world, a nomination is a win, this is why we love blog world).

Thank you so much to coffeepoweredmom!

http://coffeepoweredmom.wordpress.com/2012/06/23/one-lovely-blog-award-and-the-beautiful-blogger-award.

So part of the process of the award is to tell my readers (all ten of you) 7 things about myself that you don’t already know.  Here you go…

  1. I love Howard Stern.  My husband got me into his radio show about 10 years ago and I’ve been listening ever since.  Yes, he’s gross sometimes. Yes, sometimes my 8-year-old is more mature than him – but then there are genius interviews and funny skits.  Hysterical.
  2. When I was pregnant with my daughter we lived in NYC.  To get to work everyday I’d have to take a cross town bus and then a subway downtown.  Every day I’d come home and my husband would ask me the same question,”did someone give you a seat on the bus and the train?”.  Same question, everyday, until I stopped working.  Loved it.
  3. I don’t like mushrooms (yep, a vegetarian that doesn’t like mushrooms – discuss amongst yourselves.
  4. I interned at “Live With Regis and Kathie Lee” for a year in college.  It was the year I developed a thick skin and learned how to take criticism without jumping out a window.  BTW – Kathie Lee was charming and sweet.  Regis was the antichrist.
  5. I love Madonna.  I loved her when she was a lucky star, and when she put cones on her boobs, when she became British, and even now, when she’s a 50-year-old freakazoid. Love her.
  6. I have way too many photos of my kids around my house.  I’ve tried to take them down but my body revolts.  Can’t do it.
  7. Chocolate makes my soul sing.

Hipstamatic Hysteria

First of all – hello.  Did you miss me yesterday?  I missed you.   Saturday posts are tough in the summer – lots of running around and enjoying the good weather type of stuff.  Don’t worry – it’ll be over soon enough.

I was going to write this post yesterday, and tell you all about the Hipstamatic app.  Do you know about it? Are you loving it? And more importantly, how come no one told me about it?

A fun side benefit – now you can sing Grease Lighting and insert the word Hipstamatic every time Danny Zucko says the word automatic.  Seriously, I’m singing it in my head right now. Lots of fun.

Where were we…. It’s the coolest app of all apps.  Really.  Go get it.  Instagram who? You’ll never look back. It’s worth the $1.99 price tag (and then I may have added a few upgrades to drive that price to $3.00).

Anyway – we had some good friends over to visit this weekend and had loads of fun – this morning we took them to our favorite antique/flea market.  Here’s our outing in hipsta photos…

 

This is my pal and her hubby.  Aren’t they extra cute? Love them.  The other shot is of her and my little guy.  She met him 2 seconds after he was born.  Let’s just say she thought she was coming up for a relaxing weekend in the country and instead she was part of 3 ring circus that involved:  semi-graphic post birth horror show (I’ll save the details for another time), Indian relatives streaming in and out of said horror show, and me, all drugged up and completely oblivious to how close I was to death.  Good times.

 

They had some cool stuff at the market – but I think it looks even cooler with these funky filters.  I feel very cutting edge and mod.

 

 

I didn’t buy anything cutting edge and mod – I bought what I always buy.  A pair of big earrings.  I also bought this little leprechaun statue thingi for a friend because I immediately thought of her and her man when I saw it.  When I got home and looked at it more closely I realized it was a drunken little man leaning up against a post which is slightly offensive – and makes me even more excited to give it to her! Is that bad?

 

Here’s two more random, non related shots.  Please consider yourself lucky – there are 1,000 more pictures I won’t be posting!

Look! The Hipstamatic makes my girl look even cooler and prettier – didn’t know that was possible.  And look! It makes a random sky shot seem moody and Twin Peaksesque.  Ok – I’ll stop. For today.

 

I’ll take a venti light with a shot of nice view please….

Look at these idyllic photos.  This is the mighty Delaware, with its beautiful lush greenery and birds and bugs living in harmony.  This is why I love our town. It’s old, historic, and has bits of natural beauty all over the place.

You’d think we were miles and miles from civilization. In reality, we are a hop, skip and a jump from…..

A Starbucks!

I know this drives some people crazy. Big bad developments killing small, quaint towns etc. I don’t even particularly like Starbucks coffee – I’m more of a Dunkin Donuts kinda gal.  But I love the fact that it’s there.  I like knowing I can get a ridiculously priced coffee drink with enough caloric intake for my whole day and go see the mighty Delaware and pretend I’m George Washington.  What. Like you don’t pretend.  Whatever.

I just like my amenities.  I love the view, the nature, the majestic beauty of places – but I also love amenities.  I need amenities.

You know what makes nature even more enjoyable?  A cup of overpriced iced coffee and some bug spray you bought at the corner drugstore.

Say what?

I know some very funny people who crack me up all the time. Here’s some of my favorite quotes.  Not from famous people. Just from my people.

 
“I was going to go to Vegas on my 40th Birthday, but I got a divorce instead” – said by genius new friend within 10 minutes of meeting each other.  That’s how I knew she was my kind of folk.  I think this is what her memoir should be called!

“Money isn’t life mom.” – said by an 8-year-old boy in Target who wanted to buy a $50 Lego set.  Lego sets….I think they were the real cause of the ’08 financial meltdown.

“How can I fly with eagles when I’m surrounded by turkeys?” – said by an old co-worker who dropped jewels like this all the time. She is missed.

“Middle School is the ultimate rated R movie mom!” – said by a 13-year-old girl trying to convince her mother of letting her watch rated R movies (great quote – answer is still NO).

“I’ll just be here in the corner, chewing on wet cigarettes butts if you need me” – said by the most hysterical person I’ve ever worked with.  She can find a funny sliver lining on any situation – thank god for her.

“Is that a taco?” – said by a friend who was confronted at a party by someone he had been ignoring for months.  When cornered and asked to explain his disappearance he panicked and said the now famous line and walked away. There were no tacos anywhere.  I think I peed my pants that night. This line is now ubiquitous with any situation in my life that warrants getting out of dodge fast!

Things to talk to my future therapist about…

This isn’t really a post – it’s more like a confession.

I can’t master the art of food quantity.  Either I make too much or I make nothing. I made French toast for my kids today. They  had one piece each and were done.  Which, by the way, is exactly the amount they had the last time I made French toast. What’s wrong with me?  I’m sure it has to do with my childhood (food is not love!) or my distorted sense of reality or something.  Anyway – If you are in or around the Bucks County area – feel free to stop in.  I’ve got enough food to feed you all.  Now…onto lunch.

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