The green is always grasser

Back in 1991 when I started dating my husband, he wasn’t the chipper, happy-go-lucky guy he is today…haha

Forget glass half-full/half-empty.  He didn’t even have a glass.  ”Suck it up” was and is his mantra, his motto.  That and “I hate people”.

For the most part, I’m pretty optimistic.  Next to him – I’m little miss sunshine.

When I graduated college I thought I’d instantly find the job of my dreams.  I had a degree with my spankin’ double majors – English and Religion – to lean on.  I’d done some really cool internships, worked in the alumni office since my Freshman year – and let’s not forget how beloved I was by all my professors.  I would find success.

I was wrong.  I ended up working several less than stellar jobs where I basically did the following:

  • got breakfast and lunch every day for the CEO of the company (it was a 2 person operation, me and him) – he wouldn’t even let me answer the phone.  I spent most days there filing papers in a drawer.  There wasn’t even a radio to keep me company.
  • worked at a big ad agency in a fancy building where they did let me answer the phone – and then yelled at me non-stop for answering it wrong
  • worked in the admissions office at a private nursery school in NY.  I spent my days weeding out applications from 3 year olds who didn’t make the cut – and then calling their stressed out parents and killing dreams. The kid cried. The parents cried. I cried.  Everyone was always crying.

I know, I know.  These are uptown problems (as Chris Rock would say).  I wasn’t mining coal or laying railroad tracks – but I was miserable.

After a few months of jumping from one job to another – and hating each one – I was done.  I was pissed.  I was convinced that every single person in the city was doing better than me. Where was my shiny career?

That’s when my man, the grumpiest person alive, sat me down for some words of wisdom and optimism. He said in his most non-growl voice, “the green is always grasser.”  I laughed.  He didn’t. He was completely serious. It was perfectly imperfect advice. I use it almost daily.  Almost.

Mista Mayor

Photo Circa 1994. Me and then newly minted Mayor of NYC , Rudolph Giuliani. We were at the Pen & Sword Honor Society dinner at my college, he was the keynote that night, and an alum.  It took me all night to work up the nerve to go meet him… when I finally did, all I could say was,” My birthday is May 28th too!”. He just smiled and laughed. I think a security guard moved in closer and someone took the picture. That was it. Not sure how I got into the honor society. Here’s my main observations about this photo:

  • I rocked that tuxedo top I borrowed from my roommate.
  • Those earrings weren’t even close to being the biggest ones I owned.
  • See that hair…that’s my pre-marriage, pre-babies, frizz free, never-touched-a-flat-iron hair. I would trade one of my kids for that hair now.
  • Not sure why I felt the need to wear white eye shadow – maybe to draw extra attention to my unkept brows?
  • What I remember most about the night is that I was too chicken to tell the waiter I didn’t eat chicken – and since I wouldn’t eat anything on the plate with the chicken I hid in the bathroom until dessert was served.

Good times.

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